"Where am I?" or "Rage"
I can't decide truly which of those is the actual best fitted title of what I want to write about. I am enraged and it's outrageous!!!
Everything is pure insanity. I am ecstatic by the fact that I am here, now, at this very moment, having all the freedom to do almost everything and yet bounded to do nothing... I know who I am, I know how I got here, but what I don't know yet is what now?
I live in a society that is following some basic set of rules. The rules are following the lines of freedom; individual freedom, group freedom, freedom as a concept. So many great philosophers turned this aspect on all the sides taking each small area of the concept and elaborating upon it that everyone has no more idea what freedom really is. I have no actual insight to give upon, I have no secret knowledge at my disposal, I might even know very little on the matter or at least a bit less then you might. But what I did figure out so far, my freedom starts from where I am and it finishes where somebody else's freedom begins.
Our current society is trying to mimic this idea into laws, putting barriers and drawing borders where we should not cross nor trespass. The punishment for stepping over those borders is yet still too light in my opinion. People have no fear of crossing them...
But yet here resides the most interesting anomaly of our society: once we start defining borders for freedom, the freedom itself is being chopped. The more borders, the more pieces of chopped freedom... the more we try to define freedom into general behavior the more we are strangling it by the neck - suffocating it! Once you start making laws you are only surrounding people with confinement - we are creating prisons around us!!! Even if you are aware of it, though most likely you are not, I believe that some genetic low within us is sending us signals to start crushing down barriers, one by one. Isn't this how humanity evolved? stepping over barriers, one by one...? I'm not speaking about hormonal driven deranged people which like doing bad stuff to others just so they would have a kick out of it... I'm speaking about day-to-day "normal" (hence the quotes as normal is still not defined) people having the impulse of breaking a law, as innocent or insignificant as it seems... is it the rush of adrenaline? your need for having power, even psychological power over things imposed to you? is it our genetic written selfishness? or is it that you just want to feel a taste of more freedom?
I'm absolutely convinced that anyone reading this has done at least a few times something they wasn't suppose to, which comes in direct conflict with the society. If you have the impulse to say "I didn't" think hard when you tried to steal that candy or throwing a piece of paper on the sidewalk, or the time when you jumped into the buss without a ticket...
What actually keeps us away from becoming criminals or condemned felons is only our own set of values which burned in our character since we were kids. You can say that you were thought to be like that... yes, you were! When you are borne in a society you are bound to be part of it. We are social beings and we can not afford the damnation of being excluded from it. THE RULES OF SOCIETY ARE IMPOSED TO YOU!
So, you might wonder, where is all this going to? Is there a point speaking about it? Yes it is and the point is: should we follow the rules of society or should we shape our society based on our freedom? Our society has mutated... it's one big freaking complex mutant!!! All the inter-relationships between economics, human behavior, inherited morals, preconceptions, actual conceptions and so many others... they mutated year after year, century after century... and here we are! Do you need an example argument? The only best example which comes into my mind is nudism... yes... I'm also ashamed or at lest worried not to be seen nude... even when going to the shower after an intense hour of squash I have a bit of shame of walking around naked... it's really NOTHING to be shamed of... but can you help it? While everyone was thought that it's a shame to do that, decade after decade... here we are, being shamed of something which should be perfectly natural. Since we are here on this subject, I believe that our need of cloths back in the prehistoric age changed everything... once people started using cloths and years past by, people integrated undressing the partner into their sex ceremony (yes, it's still a hole freaking ceremony when you want to have sex). And if nudism isn't a convincing example, here's an other one for you: talking about sex. It has been taboo for so much time that we still have difficulty in expressing it. I for one would feel quite uncomfortable in a conversation about favorite position, how I like it and so forth...
To resume to the point... it's a freaking mutant society!!!
And the most interesting part of this mutant is that it can not be "normal" again once mutating over and over again. Only a sharp scalpel cut that would shake the very foundations of the concept is able to actually take society to a good path. A golden utopic society (which of course by it's utopic nature is not even remotely real).
As one buddy just a few hours ago said - we are daily loosing our unique individuality. Yes Mihai, you are correct (90% chance you were speaking about something else) - every day we're becoming just as everybody else... little by little we are becoming fully social beings, bounded by society rules, following the society's models, becoming one with the society. We are now in the full process of transhumance.
We started to be made by the society and we have stopped long time ago forming the society by our individual image. We are just sheep marching, eating, marching... and the society itself is our shepherd... driving us, taking us... somewhere...
Tell me, who's actually leading your society? Only then you will know who to ask WHERE THE HELL ARE WE GOING?
But I guess that when you're taking a good look at your "shepherd" you do the same as most of us do... turning the head the other way trying to get rid of the disgusting grimace of your face... besides... you're just an other sheep and you're happy for your freedom to take an other bite of the fresh sweet green grass!
I on the other hand do not find my place here. A part of me wants to fill the need of being a social person and let things as they are, an other part is raged and it's screams of freedom remain without echo... and then... there is one more part... the third... which says let's change something, let's start with that...
P.S. - why shouldn't I use special words in public? Are you ashamed? FUCK YOU AND YOUR RULES!
